Stability and Reference for College Students – Other Reference Points In Life
So, you are off to college to become an electrical engineer, police officer, nurse, business person or perhaps pursue one of many careers in education or other profession of your choice. How well you do in that field will have much to do with your reference points in life. What is really important to you? Do you have the confidence to talk to another person with the conviction that your talk is meaningful to them, either professionally or personally or both? If not, you are reading the right material to learn how to do so. As a unique individual, you have the power to influence others, for good or for bad. When you think about it, there really is very little room in between the two. And those that do not influence you in one direction or the other, you probably will consider as inconsequential or even boring, but certainly not fun or interesting to be around.
Some Examples
Jack is a likeable enough guy and enjoys some of the same interests as you – motorcycles, skiing, football, baseball, tennis, computers, cars and mechanics. And you both are studying mechanical engineering. However, he also smokes all the time, parties every Friday and Saturday night (and sometimes Sunday nights); and he really likes girls. Sometimes you think he enjoys flirting with girls more than anything else in life!
David is also a likeable enough guy and has a few of the same interests as you – motorcycles, tennis and computers. However, he does not smoke, sometimes even studies on Friday or Saturday night; and he often talks about his parents and his girl friend back home. You have every reason to believe he really respects his parents, who are both professionals – a lawyer and a paralegal secretary. But he really loves his girl friend and talks of marrying her someday, after he graduates and has a good enough job to support both of them.
You are getting to know both Jack and David very well. Currently, you have other friends, but Jack and David are special friends. And, you are deciding which one should become a close friend, maybe even your closest friend in college. Who will you choose? Often, that will depend on “the most influential example” in your life!
The Most Influential Example
By far, the persons most influential in the life of a new college freshman are his or her parents. Next are close relatives, then church leaders (if you have any), friends, teachers and various other acquaintances, often in that order.
Therefore, especially if you have two parents, which friend, Jack or David, do you believe your parents would prefer as your best friend, and maybe even the one you bring home for the Thanksgiving holiday?
But what if you have only one parent? Then clearly that mom or dad becomes the most influential example. And if you have no parents, then close relatives, church leaders, friends, etc. become the most influential. You can go right down the list.
Being An Example
Now, think about what type of example you are to other college students. Are you more like Jack or David or someone in between? Your reference points in life are largely, if not entirely, determined by the people you associate with. Therefore, choose wisely. Know right from wrong, try to distinguish between truth and falsehood and know that there is a difference between good and evil. Choose whatever is right, true and good and let those be your reference points in life. And you will find that parents, close relatives, church leaders and friends will all be on your side with support, guidance and genuine concern for you as you progress though your college years.
Thank you for reading. As always, your comments and questions are most welcome and encouraged. Do come again next week!
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